My Story:
Dave and I love children. We want more children and have been trying since our marriage in June to conceive a baby.
On January 25th I took a pregnancy test revealing we were pregnant! I instantly cried with excitement and sent a picture text to Dave and my Mom that we were expecting! The weeks to follow were so exciting! We told all of our closest friends and family out of excitement and could not wait to tell Miles and Katrina. We wanted to be sure everything was ok and planned on telling them after our first ultrasound. They were going to have a brother or sister!
On Thursday Feb. 17th I noticed a weird spotting happening and was instantly scared. I called the doctor and they scheduled my very first ultrasound for the next day. Dave and I went to the ultrasound so anxious and quite scared. The ultrasound tech zoomed in on the pregnancy and we saw a heart beat! Instant Tears! We were so relieved! Looking back, the technician was taking a while, and taking a lot of pictures of every little thing from every angle. Dave and I headed to lunch because the next part of my appointment wasn't until an hour later. We were relieved. The technician said she didn't have any concerns! We saw a heart beat! We were on cloud 9. I sent Dave back to work and I headed to the next part of the appointment. The doctor came in and began explaining concerns. She said that the pregnancy at one point early on were twins. We lost one twin, not sure when and there is extra tissue in the pregnancy sac next to the existing baby. She said the existing baby has a slow heart beat of 105 and is not growing. For those who don't know a baby should have a heart beat of 110 to 170 and should be higher in those numbers in such an early pregnancy. She said for being 7 weeks pregnant the baby should be doing better and she is concerned the baby won't make it. I was punched in the gut and my heart sank. She said there is nothing I did wrong and nothing I can do. That it is a waiting game and keep hoping. Things can change.
Yesterday, Monday, Feb 21st, I was with the kids and Dave at lunch when bleeding and cramping began. I panicked. I called the doctor, they brought me in to see them. The kids at this point know what is going on. We had to explain to them that we were pregnant but the pregnancy is not going well. They were sad, we were all sad. I don't know how else to explain it. Miles and Katrina amaze me with their resilience on a daily basis. They were so supportive and worried about me. I felt terrible to concern them with these problems. After all, I wanted to give them good news about expecting a brother or a sister! We headed to the doctor as a family. We say, "We're in this together".
The doctor did another ultrasound. The heart beat not nearly as visible as the first ultrasound. The doctor says about 60 beats per minute and could barely detect the heart beat but we saw it there. We saw it beating. Though the prognosis is not good and the baby will likely not make it, the doctor is hopeful and says, "I've seen crazier things happen"...There is always that miracle. He said he would not feel good doing a D&C (ridding my body of the baby) on a baby with a heart beat. So now we wait and hope for a miracle. Our closest friends and family have been sending positive vibes and prayers and I so appreciate it! Now if the blog readers would jump on board and think positive, maybe our hope and wish will come true!!! You NEVER KNOW! My next appointment is Friday, unless I need to be seen sooner, and we hope to see change!
I told Dave, if this baby makes it (which is not likely and I know that) and if it's a girl, her name will be Hope! We keep saying, "Keep Hope Alive" and stay positive etc. Anyway, I am sorry to share such terrible news, but these last few days have been an up and down and such a sad time. This thing called life is truly a miracle with ups and downs to say the least. PRAY FOR US! We want this baby so bad. We know God has a plan and sometimes people go through bad things to get to the good things....
Thanks for listening. It feels better to tell my story....Below are a few pictures of this journey so far.
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| Pure Excitement |
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| I did not believe the first test, I needed a second...Yes we're pregnant! |
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| A card for Dave, the baby Bible, the pregnancy tests |
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| Our baby..... |
